Losing and Finding Oneself: Duo- and Autoethnographic Study of "Character" in the Larp Superrealism

Abstract

This article investigates the relationship between player, character, and game experience through a case study of Superrealism (Lukka 2022), a non-verbal, music-driven live-action role-playing game (larp). First, the work presents a brief overview of role-playing game studies theories that investigate the nature of the self-concepts of players and characters. Through duoethnography and autoethnography, the authors then share their personal accounts of the game: Lukka, from his perspective as a designer and a facilitator, and Bowman and Baird, from their experiences as players. Lukka’s account reveals how the non-verbal, music-driven, allegorical narrative and vague characters encourage highly personal interpretations emerging from players projecting themselves to the game. Baird’s account provides an example of one such experience, where she was able to surface and process experiences of repressed queer grief that might have otherwise remained unconscious. Whereas Lukka found the characters to be a rather minor part of the design, Baird’s and Bowman’s accounts reveal how the characters, even if vaguely described, acted as a touchstone for the game experience. Their character concepts emerged from personal history and belongings, narrative instructions, and the use of character sheets as a prop. Together, these accounts illuminate how larps can evoke personal, meaningful, and potentially transformative experiences by creating safe interpersonal spaces, where evocative music, non-verbal play, narrative, and characters allow for the processing of intimate personal content. The article also demonstrates how this process continues in later sense-making after the larp.